


Rambling

by Flung_through_galaxies



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Awkward Kylo Ren, F/M, Fluff, Reader is pretty awkward too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-02-13
Packaged: 2018-09-23 23:13:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9686420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flung_through_galaxies/pseuds/Flung_through_galaxies
Summary: You're a weapons specialist for the First Order and it's a rather slow day. Kylo Ren asks to speak with you in private and reveals things you had only dreamed you'd ever hear from him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Request from Tumblr user (and friend) @savvykat  
> Prompt: “No, no! Brown is a great color! Lots of awesome things are brown…like trees! Oh, and chocolate! And shi-” She made this prompt up on her own, I'm proud of her. xD

Another slow day on the ship meant another day spent lounging around your cabin. Reading, drawing up weapon designs, repairing a malfunctioning blaster. There wasn't much else to do until the ship reached it’s destination and the scouting mission began.

Deciding you've had enough of just sitting around in your cabin, you make your way out of your quarters and begin wandering around the corridors of the ship.

Ever since the destruction of Starkiller Base, you had been stationed on Kylo Ren’s ship as his weapons manager. You had grown rather close to the Knight of Ren in all the time spent together through battles, strategy planning, and the occasional off-duty encounter that turns into a few hours of deep conversation. 

Getting to know Kylo had taken quite some time. He was a very cautious individual, and kept his emotional walls built up high. 

But, even through all of his defenses, you could see that his actions were driven by confusion and fear. 

You'd never tell anyone about the doubt you saw in Kylo. You weren't loyal to the First Order, you were just here for the job. It's not really your place to rat out the Knight of Ren.

Your aimless wandering eventually takes you to the control room. Commanders and a flight crew were always gathered here, occasionally rotating with others of the same position. 

You spot General Hux and join him near a large screen that shows readings of atmospheric conditions on nearby planets.

“Do you know of any divisions that are in need of weapon repairs?” You ask the General, hoping he knew of some work that could cure your boredom. 

Hux replied in a clipped manner, not even bothering to draw his attention away from the screen. “I have not received any repair requests.”

You roll your eyes at the back of his head, annoyed by the man’s lack of personality. He had never shown you any side of him other than his strict military persona. You were starting to believe he truly didn’t have any substance to his personality.

Bored and annoyed by the stale atmosphere of the control room, you decide to return to your cabin to fiddle with a blaster design you had been working on.

You were almost to the door of your cabin, when you heard a raspy, metal voice call out to you. 

Turning in the direction of the voice’s origin, your eyes land on the tall and menacing form of Kylo Ren.

“May I be of assistance, Sir?” You ask, using formalities in public to prevent any suspicions that you and your leader were anything more than comrades.

“I need to speak with you about an important matter in private.” Kylo’s tone is short and cold as he answers, which leads you to believe he might be attempting to conceal some deeper emotion.

“My cabin is just around this corner.” You say, tilting your head to the corridor off to your right. “We can talk in my office and then you can look over the weapon design I've been working on.”

Kylo simply nods his head in response and waits for you to lead the way to your quarters. He can tell you're keeping things professional around the various crew members that were moving about the halls. 

You lead Kylo around the corner and a few doors down the hallway, until you reach the cabin for that has your name and rank displayed on a small plaque above the biometric scanner. 

Gently placing your hand on the scanner pad, you risk a glance at Kylo. It's nearly impossible to gauge his emotions when he has his mask on, which you guess is the purpose of the metal contraption, but you have learned Kylo’s body language over your time spent together. 

His shoulders were held high and rigid. His arms pressed tightly to his sides, with hands clenched dangerously tight into fists. Based on his posture, he could be furious, frustrated, or possibly a mixture of the two. 

The scanner accepts your biometrics and your door slides open. You motion for Kylo to step in before you. 

Following after him, you turn back to glance around the corridor before your door shuts to see if anyone witnessed your leader entering your living quarters. 

There seemed to be no one in the small hallway, so you turn back and follow Kylo the rest of the way into your cabin. 

“So, what can I help you with?” You start in a friendly and inviting tone. Hopefully, he'll open up easier if he knows you mean no harm. 

Kylo pauses for a moment, then reaches up to the latches on either side of his helmet. You watch as the helmet releases with the hissing sound of compressed air. 

As he removes his helmet completely and sets it on your work table, your face softens at the sight of his surprisingly nervous features. You feel the need to calm the powerful and dark man before you. 

He opens his mouth to speak, before hesitating a moment more. You wait patiently, so as not to rush him. 

“I’ve been feeling very… confused lately.” Kylo finally says in a hushed tone. 

You tilt your head in reaction to his words, which sound weak and vulnerable, very out of character for a man who is usually commanding and intense.

You speak calmly, being careful not to patronize Kylo. “Could you tell me what you’ve been confused about? I’ll be able to help better if I know a little more about what’s bothering you.”

At your words, Kylo looks up from the ground and meets your gaze. A shiver runs through you at the intensity in his eyes.

“I’ve… noticed that I have feelings for you. Feelings that I didn’t know I could have.”

His words catch you off guard and you pause for a moment.

You were pretty sure you knew the answer to your next question, but you didn’t want anything to be lost in translation.

“Good feelings or bad feelings?” 

Kylo drops eye contact as he speaks again. “Good, I think. Unless this makes you uncomfortable. I guess it would be bad in that case.”

“Unless what makes me uncomfortable, Kylo?” Your response comes out quieter than you meant it to.

“Being around you, talking to you, has become the high point of my day. Whenever I leave for a few days on a mission, I find myself wishing I were back here with you. Missing you and the conversations we have. I miss the jokes you make, which are funny even though I don’t laugh at them most of the time. You make me feel like Ben Solo again. You bring out the Light in me, (Y/N).”

Throughout his words, you find yourself subconsciously drifting closer to Kylo. By the end of his speech, you’re merely 6 inches away from him.

You decide to close the gap, reaching your arms up and around his shoulders to embrace him.

Kylo tenses for a moment before relaxing into your grip and wrapping his arms timidly around your waist.

You enjoy the feelings running through you for a while before speaking up again, keeping your statement short and sweet.

“I feel the same way about you.”

Kylo pulls away from the tight embrace, but remains with his arms around you. He looks down at you with the most genuine smile you’ve ever seen on his face.

Meeting his eyes with your own, you realize that you’ve never been this close to Kylo before. The color of his eyes is striking from this short distance and you feel the need to share this thought with him.

“You’re eyes are lovely. I’ve never noticed that before.” 

“They’re brown. There’s nothing all that lovely about brown.” He responds matter-of-factly, slightly amused by your sudden fascination in his eye color.

Picking up on the fact that he’s teasing you,the self-defensive backtracking begins.

"No, no! Brown is a great color! Lots of awesome things are brown...like trees! Oh, and chocolate! And shi-" Your rambling is silenced by the press of Kylo’s lips against yours.

Your eyes widen in surprise of his suddenly bold behavior, but flutter closed as you lean into the kiss and deepen it. 

Kylo breaks away first and smiles sweetly at you. 

“If that’s your way of ending my rambling, please feel free to do it at any time.” You say as you return his smile.

Kylo laughs at your comment. A real, genuine, laugh that you’ve never heard from him before.

The feeling of happiness that sweeps through you in that moment lets you know that this is the beginning of something wonderful.


End file.
